(The Awakening of) Fort Champion

Anyone that knows me and has stayed up to any particularly late hour of the night knows I go through a few phases as the morning creeps ever so slowly closer towards the unconscious world. I have a cynical phase, a barely awake phase, and then right between the hours of three and five past midnight I become really really goofy. It was during such a time that a grand idea emerged, a plan for a visionary new developmental project that would shock the whole world to it's very core, only with no negative repercussions on the actual earth's core so we don't have to go and make another shitty movie like The Core. No....no, this, this would be better than all that. This would be a modern marvel of engineering and architecture and would most likely get it's own episode on the History Channel show Modern Marvels.

We would build a fort.
Funny enough though totally par for the course when it comes to me, the idea for this fort stemmed from me basically acting like a total fucktard with my sweatshirt. From there a masterpiece was born. I hadn't built an actual fort in ages, but skills like that never get rusty. Every person who has ever truly been a child always remembers that the floor could in fact be lava at any moment and exactly how to build a fort using anything and everything available in the room.

I happened to be staying over a friend's house that night and upon realizing what my fucktardery had inspired we both set to work immediately. We pillaged chairs, pillows, blankets, everything and anything that could have been used to reinforce ourselves in some manner from the unseen enemies lurking at every corner, able to fell everything that isn't made out of sheets and furniture. We toiled endlessly, making it more and more elaborate over the course of about an hour and a half. In the end we had an absolute masterpiece.

The whole living room area had sheets draped across it, save for one area designated as a court yard nearest to Pete's section. My area was split into the upper ramparts and the lower formation grounds, barricaded off through indestructible pillows and a few of the computer chairs. Access was nigh on impossible for an intruder, as they would have to pass through the entirety of the fort's inner walkway and then cross around the back underneath another flap. I ended up passing out on the ramparts, standing vigilant against the foes of my own personal nation of win.

Of course, there was one being that could somehow penetrate our walls, despite my every effort...Omen, Pete's doom cat. I swear that thing will be the death of us all.